Walk to Beautiful

marriage at a young age.

followed by pregnancy.

prolonged labor,

3 days, maybe more...

no money to pay doctors,

maybe no hospital to go to.

or just too long of a wait for care.

finally a surgery to take the baby out.

the pain of labor for many days,

and now a painful incision,

are no match for the pain to follow.

a stillborn baby.

maybe the only child she will ever have.

awake in the hospital,

alone.

confused.

in pain.

with no child.

and now a new problem.

why am I leaking urine?

this has never happened before.

but it will not stop.

A constant leak

a stench that cannot be hidden.

no husband will lay next to a woman who leaks

and smells.

so alone.

No community will accept this condition

The only acknowledgement

is a hurtful word

or maybe abuse.

So very alone.

  

What to do but hide?

But to feel ashamed,

and hopeless.

Years go by with no answers

no help

no hope.

How do you cope?

What keeps you moving,

believing,

living?

I want to introduce you to a group of women in the hospital.  They are women with obstetric fistulas, usually VVF’s (vesico-vaginal fistulas). There is a fistula, or hole, between the bladder and vagina, causing constant leaking of urine.  There are also women with recto-vaginal fistulas, in which both stool and urine leak uncontrollably.  These fistulas occur almost always as a result of prolonged, untreated, obstructed labor during childbirth.  The prolonged labor can last anywhere from 2-10 days. The infant's head pressing against tissue, causes the tissue to die from lack of blood supply, creating these openings.  Marriage and conception at a young age (13-15 years) before the pelvis is fully developed is a big reason for this.  In about 95% of these cases, the baby dies during labor and the woman is left unable to produce children again.  Many times, the husband and/or other children will disown her as she smells of urine constantly, and she is ostracized and cast out of her community. Alone, ashamed, and devastated.

These women come to the ward with faces that reveal years of shame and solitude.  They are uncertain, scared, and rarely smile. After surgery, some healing, prayer, worship, and lots of hugs, they start smiling and their personalities emerge.  These ladies are among the most beautiful, patient, loving, incredible women I have ever met. 

When they are "dry" (no longer leaking), we have a dress ceremony for them.  I went to my first one last week. Each woman gets a new dress (and jewelry to match of course) and they parade down the hall singing worship songs and beaming from ear to ear.  The joy is palpable.  They tell their testimonies, are gifted with symbolic items, and we celebrate their lives and the bright future ahead. There is no way to experience this and not be moved to tears. They are so deserving of happiness, good health, love, and of course, new dresses.